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Stop the Self-Sabotage And Learn How to Love Yourself

Every day, almost everywhere we look, we’re bombarded with someone else’s idea of perfection. We’re told, “You need this,” “You should wear this,” and “You need to be this way or that way,” but no one tells us that we’re just fine.

In this society of “whoever has the most toys wins,” no one does.

We do that to ourselves with negative thinking about our bodies, wanting more things, and trying to make ourselves something we aren’t. We watch TV and movies and see perfection: the perfect romance and the dashing hero saving the damsel, where everyone is beautiful, heroic, with money and perfect.

That’s fiction. We need to learn to accept ourselves and enjoy the good things we have in our own lives.That’s reality and the only way to recall one’s self. 

Here are a few areas where you may be comparing yourself to others. You’ll find out how to get away from the “societal norm” or “societal impressions” so you can be on your way to loving yourself for who you are.

Your Body

Hollywood would think that everyone is tanned, skinny, fit, and has perfect hair, teeth, and skin. , but it’s all a facade! You can’t compare yourself to that imagined picture of beauty. 

Your personal best from inside you. Write down the things that you love about yourself. If you’re overweight and unhappy about it, then do something! Change how you eat or get out and walk a little every day. Not everyone is a supermodel, nor is everyone supposed to be.

Your Career

If you’re stuck in a job you hate, find a new one. If your work is making you physically ill, it’s time to move on. That misery you feel will carry over to the rest of your life. 

Figure out what you love doing, and then find a way to get paid to do it. It’s not easy, and it might not happen overnight, but if you love what you do, your entire life outlook improves.

Your Possessions

We’re bombarded with ads for stuff, and they all look so amazing. We find ourselves wanting more and more things, but do we need them? Possessions won’t fill any personal void you have or provide you with true happiness. Many of us are too busy focusing on our outward glow but have failed to be mindful of our inward glow; that is, health, wellness, and mental clarity. 

What is it you’re missing in your life? Figure that out and then fill that need, but be honest and realistic with yourself about it.

Your Relationship 

If you’re in a healthy relationship and you’re genuinely in love for several decades, then you’re very blessed. In reality, as a relationship goes on for months and years, it may not be that whirlwind of romance anymore, and you can’t always expect your partner to be breathtaking.

Yet, no matter what you see on TV or social media, a relationship always takes work and sacrifices. Think of ways to make your relationship feel new and exciting, and bring joy in the fact that you have someone who loves you.

Maintaining a good marriage is a lot like baking a good cake: the outcome is 70% the quality of the ingredients, 25% the skill of the baker, and 5% luck. Therefore, most of the requirements for a long and happy marriage are within your control, so it pays to work at keeping your relationship healthy.

Your Past

The past is just that – the past. You can’t do anything about history except learn from it. You can’t base your life around a singular event, no matter how great or terrible it was. All you can do is remember and learn from it. 

Many of us are holding on to so much baggage from the past, we have not properly healed. In order for us to maintain a healthy relationship with ourselves or others we have to heal from the past. 

Don’t let something that happened eat you up and destroy your future. Instead, think about how you can become better from it, and then commit to move forward.

Love Yourself

Lastly, remember that you are who you are. Everyone is supposed to be different; it’s what makes you unique. There’s no one in the world who is exactly like you, which makes you special, unique, and unforgettable.

You’re probably familiar with self-help books and talk show hosts who tell you to love yourself, but you may be wondering how to go about that. While your relationship with yourself is the most crucial connection in your life, it’s easy to forget about nurturing it.

However, self-love and compassion are too crucial to neglect because they shape your experiences and relationships with others.

Protect your health and wellbeing by making positive changes in the way you think about and treat yourself.

Changing the Way You Think about Yourself

Maybe you’re hard on yourself, or you’re so busy with external obligations that you rarely consider your priorities. Looking inward could help you to value yourself more.

These strategies will help you to think more highly of yourself:

  1. Accept yourself. Know that you are worthy of love and respect just the way you are at this moment. Embrace yourself with all your strengths and weaknesses.
  2. Clarify your purpose. Invent your definition of success. Ask yourself what a meaningful life means to you, even if that answer changes over time.
  3. Talk yourself up. How do you speak to yourself? Choose words that are encouraging and uplifting. Use your internal dialogue to build your confidence and manage your emotions.
  4. Offer forgiveness. Let go of the past so that you can move on. Take any decisions that you regret and turn them into opportunities to learn. Make amends where possible and resolve to handle things more constructively in the future.
  5. Avoid comparisons. Facebook didn’t invent social comparisons, but social media has increased the potential for envy and inferiority complexes. Try competing with your last performance instead of living up to someone else’s standards. You’ll accomplish more if you dare to be yourself.
  6. Think positive. Looking on the bright side and being able to laugh at yourself makes you even more loveable. It also helps you to manage stress and deal with difficult circumstances.

Changing the Way, You Treat Yourself

Do your actions match your beliefs? You might say you love yourself, but your efforts could be sending a different message.

Try these techniques to treat yourself kindlier:

  1. Practice self-care. Develop habits that keep your mind and body fit and strong. Go to bed early and exercise each day. Eat a balanced diet and watch your weight.
  2. Pick friends wisely. Surround yourself with family and friends who encourage and support you. Cultivate close relationships with others who share your goals. Engage in deep conversations where you can share your feelings and receive validation.
  3. Pursue your passions. Identify the activities that bring you joy and fulfillment. Block out time each day for something you love, whether it’s a task related to your job or something you do in your leisure time.
  4. Set goals. Give yourself something to strive for. Working towards realistic and challenging goals builds your confidence as you add to your achievements.
  5. Maintain boundaries. Know your limits so you can define what behavior you consider acceptable. That may include physical limitations such as needing your own space and psychological boundaries such as being entitled to your feelings and opinions.
  6. Advocate for yourself. Once you understand your needs, you can communicate them to others. You’ll grow more skillful as you practice being direct and tactful in letting someone know if they cross your boundaries.
  7. Seek support. Ask for what you need. Let others know precisely what they can do, whether you’re looking for practical assistance like pitching in with housework or just a friendly ear to listen while you sort out your feelings.

Loving yourself can help you to enjoy more happiness, overcome challenges, and build healthier relationships with others. Make it a habit to treat yourself with kindness and respect.

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